What can we say?♥♥

I miss having someone around.
I'm not saying that i miss him.
I just miss the companionship.
Having someone to call my own.
Having someone to protect me.
Having someone to ease my pain.
Maybe its just the status i miss.
The '' he's my boyfriend'' statement.
Something we proudly declare to the whole
damn world.
i just miss having someone there.
I guess i deserved this, you could say.

or maybe I'm just beginning to feel the pain
from yesterday now.

Tarian today was ouhkiee.
i think.
Practiced as per normal.
here and there.
Hate the stoopid LT.
Damn stage so the hell unstable.

Rushed to tutoring afterwards
but damn train was freaking packed
i'm serious..
macam nk meletop.
To add to the chaos, the effing train
terminated at Yew Tee. YEW TEE!
of all places. That's like in the middle of nowhere.
So Hanisa and i decided to bounce back to CCK and
when we boarded the next train
it freaking terminated at YEW TEE again!
@!%"$£"*& right?!
urgh!

I'm serious.
Just shoot me.
In the head would be fine.

Horrible day today.
Fitness and conditioning.
Damn economics test.
Handicapped debate.
2407080hrs of sastra.

School ended when the sun has set.

uurgh.
someone just shoot me.
today is just a freaking horrible day.

Everybody deserves a fresh start. A clean break.
Nobody wants to be trapped in something you know
is killing you inside.
I'm wearing thin down to the core.
My spirit is breaking.
You know i am.
But why can't you acknowledge it?
Babe,
i'm not leaving,
just merely moving on..without you.
and it's something that you have to do to.
Love is not about being with that person every minute of the day.
Love is about missing you.
Treasuring every moment with you.
Tasting the sweet and the sour with smiles across our faces.
But i don't feel that with you.
Not anymore.
So you tell now,
how are we going to continue
when what is driving us now is just obligation?
babe,
you were right.
people can't change.
you deserve to be happy.
But i can't lose myself just to give you that.
Then i would just be wasting my time away,
lying to myself,
holding on to something that i know is not real
For now, just get better.
Take your meds.
take care of your health, your heart.
I can't lose you. not yet.
But i can be there, just not as before.
I can't say that i'm not to be blamed for all that has happened.
I'm sorry, i truly am.
But you had a part too.
So lets compromise.
I'm the girl that is and isn't yours.
I'm the girl leaving but with only one foot out the door.
I'm the girl whose heart is learning to love all over again..
maybe for you
maybe for someone else.
but one thing is for sure.
You always be a part of my life.
So let's just leave it at that.